


Needing him

by seamistress89



Series: Needing him, Missing him [1]
Category: Free!
Genre: Angst, Car Accidents, Character Death, Drowning, F/M, Haru centric, I suck at tags, I'm really unsure lol, M/M, Reapers, also I feel like trash for writing this, does this count as having a happy ending?, haru feels, i think im sorry?, if that counts for anything?, makoto was out of town at the time, possible trigger warnings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-09
Packaged: 2018-09-23 03:01:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9638033
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seamistress89/pseuds/seamistress89
Summary: They say a Reaper can take the form of a person you care for the most. Haruka never expected Makoto to come over that day. Especially not after that incident...





	

**Author's Note:**

> Sea: ... Fuck me, is all I have to say. I so don't wanna write this because I'm emotional at just the THOUGHT of writing it, but it won't leave me alone!!!
> 
> So I'm just going to say now... I'm sorry.

[Oh, and before I forget, this was my playlist I was listening to while writing this.](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL-NtZJE1HD4bqb3HOIK3RIVNCCjbqBdiw)

* * *

 

Ocean blue eyes stare up at the ceiling, wide but emotionless. Well, one can assume emotionless anyways. Only one person has ever been able to read his more-or-less blank expressions.

  
That person? He's not around to read him. Hes almost thankful for this fact. Then he remembers why. The thankful thought turns solemn and Nanase Haruka's expression falls from emotionless to depressed.  
As his emotional state falls, his body sinks. The water logged fingers and toes protest as the teen sinks until his lips are underwater. Air bubbles lift to the surface as he sighs out. The water doesn't bother his taste buds as much as it probably should. Probably from his poor tendency to swallow chlorine filled water. Sure, that has made him sick, but it never stopped him from opening his mouth in the pool while he was swimming under the surface.

  
Makoto would probably scold him for swallowing the water like this. At the moment, though, Haruka couldn't force himself to care. His eyes close as he sinks until the tip of his nose skims the surface.  
Air bubbles begin to slow as he breathes out into the depths of his Heavenly tomb. If it were possible, Haruka would ask two things of a coffin for himself. For it to be filled with water, and to be buried next to Makoto. Haruka didn't imagine at least one of those as far fetched, right?

  
A sigh causes the bubbles to multiply once more as blue eyes open again. He stares down at the surface with a solemn expression. What's a guy to do now? He had a weekend planned out for them that time. Makoto would come over Friday afternoon, and... Another sigh. That just had to happen, didn't it? He was still a year and a half from being normal. Why did Makoto have to go and cut that short? Or would it be considered abnormal still?

  
Is missing your best friend abnormal still? The thought is a rather curious one, isn't it? On one hand, it can be considered normal to miss a friend. On the other hand, it's been two weeks since...

  
A breath -- and a mouthful of water -- is sucked in from a hiss as his thoughts wander too close to... His head shakes roughly. No. He can't think of that! Not now... not when he's inn the tub like this. He lets out another sigh and shifts his body. His knee caps surface as he moves to lay on his back in the warm depths.His eyes remain open this time as he looks up through the water and to the ceiling again. He just stares. He lets the water surround him, hug him, wrap around him like the best security blanket. Or shock blanket? Hm. He supposes some could argue they could be used for the same reason, couldn't they?

  
Somewhere in him, he can't help but hope so. Somewhere in his mind, he unconsciously could admit he needs both. To be honest though? Haruka is not sure he could admit it outwards. Another sigh, another set of air bubbles. His vision was starting to grow dark. Even the best of swimmers needed to surface eventually. Haruka knew this.

  
This did not cause him to want to surface though. His eyes simply closed again. The water felt nice. He didn't want to surface for any reason. In fact? There felt like there was no reason to surface. So why should he?

  
Yes, he still had friends, but... They didn't feel like it was enough to pull himself up. He was gone. Haruka had no true reason to pull himself up.

  
It was painful. Fuck, it was painful. But Nanase Haruka had made up his mind. He was going through with this. He held his breath for what felt like forever. Did it really take this long to...? His vision grew darker, even through shut lids. His fingers and legs trembled. He was desperate to just let go. Haruka knew it wasn't time yet, though.

  
Just a little longer...

  
"Haru-chan."

  
That voice! He let out a gasp and his lungs filled. The sudden-ness of it was overwhelming. It didn't take him more then a few seconds now. He finally felt free.

  
His eyes snap open when he felt the presence. So familiar. A hand reaches down to offer to him. When he looks up, he feels like he's drowning again.

  
Green. This is his only thought when he looks to meet that gaze. He's still in the water, but slowly, shakily, a hand reaches up for the other.

  
The other hand is steady as its owner smiles down at the teen in the water. That smile, so gentle, caring, knowing. The last one almost makes him wince.

  
"It's time to get out now." The other speaks up with a gentle tone. "You don't want to keep **Him** waiting, right?"

  
A thought crosses his min. _Him_?

  
The other seems to read him and chuckles. "You know who I'm referring to, right? He's waiting for you, you know. Though I doubt he'll be too pleased over this at first." The man -- thing? -- wearing Tachibana Makoto's skin simply laughs. Despite the rest of his body shaking with the light laughter, the hand extended remains still.

  
Haruka eyes the hand warily. finally a sigh escapes. This time there is no bubbles that rise. Instead, the water in still. This... doesn't surprise him, really. A hand parts from his tomb that his body will rest in until its found. The limb that reaches out almost looks transparent. Haruka is okay with his. His hand clasps into the outstretched one and the other helps him to sit up.

  
"You're wearing his skin." Is the first thing Haruka says.

  
The one wearing his friends skin only laughs at the simplicity of the comment. He beams a smile to the other. "Does it make you uncomfortable?" When Haruka hesitates, he goes on. "I'm sorry. I'm a Reaper though. In my profession, I've come to the realization that if we dress as a loved one -- alive or deceased -- the newly departed feels a little more comfortable with us. I am willing to change though, if...?" He trails off.

  
After a moment, Haruka shakes his head. "It's alright."

  
The Reaper nods in understanding. Haruka is comfortable with the being dressed as he is, then. "That's a relief. I'm glad I chose the right skin to approach you in. I wasn't sure if you'd be more comfortable with me like this or your grandmother? You seemed close to both."

  
Haruka shakes his head. "I was closer to Makoto."

  
The Reaper chuckles again. "As I guessed." They were silent for a second. The Reaper gestures to the edge of the tub. "May I sit?" Haruka nods and the other sits with a thank you. "So... If I may be so bold... Your choice in ending...?"

  
"Was a whim, I guess." They both knew this was bull shit. This was planned, but the Reaper simply nods.

  
"I understand." The Reaper was silent again for a long moment. "You wanted to be with Him again, right? With Tachibana Makoto?" There's only a seconds hesitation. Haruka nods. "When you're ready, I can take you to him, if this is your wish?" Another nod. The Reaper smiles kindly in understanding. A hand is extended and holds there patiently.

  
Haruka stays in the tub for a little longer. He is sat up again, hands in between his legs and folded together. It takes another few minutes before he is ready, but the Reaper remains patient. A deep breath releases and Haruka looks up again. His hand moves once more into the Reaper's and this time he accepts the help to stand and out of the tub.

  
"Is there anyone you might wish to visit before you depart this Dimension?"

  
Haruka hesitates. Should he...? He thinks of Nagisa and Rei for a moment. They probably wouldn't want to see his spirit floating before them. Well, Rei probably wouldn't at least. Nagisa would probably think it cool until he realizes later why Haruka was a spirit. His mind then turns to Kou. While his manager and her boyfriend were sweet, he wouldn't want to scare her either (Momotarou would probably be given a heart attack too. He didn't quite feel like being the cause of Kou's boyfriends' death. He shudders at the thought of her finding a way to make his after life into a Hell).

  
His mind then turns to Rin. This time he hesitates a little more. He'd be lucky if he found Rin alone, to be honest. Ever since Sosuke's hurt shoulder, it is hard to find the red head alone. The thought almost brings a smile to Haruka's lips. Rin really cares for that man...

  
He's glad Rin can find happiness.

  
After his mind wanders through all his true possibilities (he only knows anyone else by acquaintance so they're not worth his time), he lifts his head and shakes it. "I'm ready."

  
The Reaper smiles kind heartedly and nods in understanding. "Let's get going then, Haru-chan." There's a twitch in Haruka's brow, but he sighs and complies. He lets the Reaper lead him away, and to Makoto once more.

**Author's Note:**

> Sea: So, that was a little harder to write then I'd like to admit, but I got it done!
> 
> There WILL be a companion piece to this covering what really happened to Makoto! I think i'll make it its own thing, so this will be a two part thing!
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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